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More About This Title Nurture the Nature: Understanding and Supporting Your Child's Unique Core Personality
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Based on the most recent brain research, Nurture the Nature features the Ten Tips for Nurturing the Nature of Your Baby, self-tests, checklists, and many other tools for you to help your kids get exactly the kind of support they need, from infants to adolescents.
While offering positive ideas for nurturing your child, Gurian also shows how to avoid the stress, pressures, and excessive competition of what he identifies as social trends parenting. Most parents know instinctively that their child is unique and has special potential, weaknesses, and strengths. No child is a blank slate. Gurian calls on parents to turn away from one-size-fits-all approaches and instead support the individual core nature of a child with effective and customized loving care.
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Michael Gurian is a family therapist and the New York Times best-selling author of The Wonder of Boys, The Wonder of Girls, The Good Son, Boys and Girls Learn Differently! and The Minds of Boys, among many others. He is cofounder of the Gurian Institute and a pioneer in the fields of family development, education, and gender studies. He has appeared on Today, Good Morning America, CNN, NPR, and in the New York Times, USA Today, Time, Newsweek, and elsewhere.
English
Understanding Your Own and Your Child’s Core Nature: An Observation Tool vii
Acknowledgments xv
Introduction: Rediscovering Our Children 1
Your Child’s Nature 5
Nurture the Nature of Your Child 7
Essential Parenting 12
A Special Feature for Moms and Dads with Newborns: Ten Tips for Nurturing the Nature of Your Baby 15
Part One Protecting the Nature of Your Child 19
1 Escaping the Social Trends Parenting System 21
What is Chronic Stress in the American Family? 24
The Social Trends Parenting System 32
Nurturing Your Child’s Nature 37
Getting Started 39
2 Understandinging the Core Nature of Your Child 43
Using Nature-Based Theory in Your Family 46
The Myth of the Blank Slate Child 47
Eight New Sciences That Can Help You Understand Your Child’s Core Nature 52
Creating a Profile of Your Child’s Core Nature 63
Your Essential Parenting Blueprint 77
“Who Am I?” 78
Part Two Nurturing the Nature of Your Child 83
3 Nurturing the Nature of Your Infant 85
Preview of Essential Developmental Tasks 86
Information Essential to Nurturing the Core Nature of Your Infant 87
Natural Differences Between Infant Boys and Girls 92
A Revolution in Parenting 94
Essential Mothers, Essential Fathers 95
Parents-Beyond-Parents 100
The Importance of the Mother-Infant Bond 104
Burning Question: Can Vaccinations Harm My Infant? 112
Parenting as a Spiritual Discipline 113
4 Nurturing the Nature of Your Two- to Three-Year-Old 116
Preview of Essential Developmental Tasks 117
Information Essential to Nurturing the Core Nature of Your Toddler 117
Natural Differences Between Toddler Girls and Boys 121
The Importance of Play, Order, and Discipline 125
Self-Awareness of Your Own Core Nature 132
Burning Question: How Do I Handle Tantrums? 133
“She Was a Handful!” 136
5 Nurturing the Nature of Your Four- to Six-Year-Old 138
Preview of Essential Developmental Tasks 141
Information Essential to Nurturing the Core Nature of Your Four- to Six-Year-Old 142
Natural Differences Between Boys and Girls Age Four to Six 146
Handling Sibling Rivalry 148
Helping Your Self-Educating Child Ask, “Who Am I?” 151
Redefining Food, Shelter, and Clothing 156
Burning Question: How Do I Find the Best School for My Four- to Six-Year-Old? 162
Moving Forward with Both Peace and Excitement 166
6 Nurturing the Nature of Your Seven- to Ten-Year-Old 170
Preview of Essential Developmental Tasks 171
Information Essential to Nurturing the Core Nature of Your Seven- to Ten-Year-Old 172
Natural Differences Between School-Age Girls and Boys 175
Focusing on the Art of Relationship to Protect Your Child’s Core Nature 178
Protecting a Child’s Core Nature by Creating Symbiotic Marriage or Symbiotic Divorce 182
Burning Question: How Much Media is Too Much? 193
The Courage of Parents 197
Part Three Nurturing the Nature of Your Adolescent 201
7 Nurturing the Nature of Your Eleven- to Fourteen-Year-Old 203
Preview of Essential Developmental Tasks 205
Information Essential to Nurturing the Core Nature of Your Pubescent Child 206
Natural Differences Between Early Adolescent Boys and Girls 211
Helping Your Pubescent Child Through Early Adolescent Adaptations of Core Nature 214
Joining Together to Link Fathers and Men to Early Adolescents 221
Burning Question: How Do I Protect My Early Adolescent’s Self-Esteem? 226
Moving Forward with Pride 231
8 Nurturing the Nature of Your Fifteen- to Eighteen-Year-Old 235
Preview of Essential Developmental Tasks 238
Information Essential to Nurturing the Core Nature of Your Middle Adolescent 239
Natural Differences Between Middle Adolescent Girls and Boys 244
Adapting Your Family to Accommodate Your Middle Adolescent’s Individuation of Core Nature 247
Helping Adolescents Through Crisis 254
Burning Question: What is the Best Way to Handle Peer Groups? 261
Becoming a Woman, Becoming a Man 267
9 Nurturing the Nature of Your Adolescent of Nineteen and Older 271
Preview of Essential Developmental Tasks 273
Information Essential to Nurturing the Core Nature of Your Late Adolescent 274
Natural Differences Between Young Men and Young Women 277
Identifying and Helping Young Men and Young Women Who Lack a Mission in Life 282
Burning Question: Why are Young People Maturing So Much Later Than We Did? 293
The Mission in Life 295
Epilogue 299
Appendixes
A: Principles of Nature-Based Families 301
B: Tracking Your Child’s Core Personality Through Genetics: How to Draw and Understand a Genogram 303
C: More Help with Food, Shelter, and Clothing: A Discussion Starter for Parent Groups 307
Notes and References 311
Bibliography 337
The Gurian Institute 341
About the Author 343
Index 345
